finding little bits to pick apart

2004-03-05, 12:15 a.m.

sorry. it's self depreciating and i feel it so deep, in the pulp of my bones and on the lining of my intestines.

like a wave held against its will, i am building up for some unequivocal discovery, human or material, because its always in my dreams.

just a little more tired lately, with knots under my shoulders that twist a bit harder, and carve the landscape of my back in a subtely different mannor. if i could traverse her back, she was there for me to see, and for me to confess, but with no name and nothing i could keep for rememberence. so i rebel, i hold onto the memory, wearing the faded images as jeans, and the emotion stirred in my soda. must be there. must be outside somewhere, away from the clicking and clacking of routine or safety nets of homework

i miss you, but i havent met you yet...