oh brave new world

2003-08-17, 9:07 p.m.

the particles are subsiding, a day of choices, shaking the crystalline space into a snowstorm of blue shards; alone. How dare i ask for the things that could act with incindiary duty to light me aflame again. Those things, which undoubtedly touch the walls of our hearts and stomaches, bring us to lift our heads and stare skyward, to close eyes in mid-day meditation (walking a trusted path), they are fickle friends. These are the things which never come when we ask them to, except for the purely quantum coincidences where our hopes are met by reality -something that religion loves to play off as 'miraculous'-, we dont hold our breaths.

dull but clean, as if someone had hushed poetry into the ear of a copper sun; thoughts have a haze that shines. In a million forms, they surface to our conscious state, dormant for indistinguishable periods of time, and they brew up smiles or crow's feet. Lightning clouds pressed between the pages of a Midsummers Night Dream, a sidewalk preacher performing in a symphonic interlude, a second lived thousands of times just to test the one real occurence. oh, the way time twists in the hands of a potter, slickened and shiney, completely unformed but revered as an ancient vase.

so the stifled cough of a singer rings clearly, and the bird sits perched on the edge of a tree branch, both revive memories of quiet, of solitude. In years that may include my existence, i will revisit the sounds and the sights of silence, even with the weight of someone dependent on your words. all around is the notion that loves comes with the same inevitable approach as death -how funny that we can use simple words for two of lifes ultimate epiphanies-, but i fail to hear the footsteps, i listen intently with hands pressed tighly to my ears; i can only hear the beat and rush of blood in my veins. the last thing, that final door, last bid, strongest speech, most sincere smile that we look for, is not between the lines, it clings to me like jeans in a rain storm; i am alone.