at least i have alice in wonderland

2002-12-31, 11:59 a.m.

hmm this is all very interesting and unforseen. forrest: i want to call you because you wont call me, but then again. I am sick and fucking tired of being the one who calls, the one who asks for forgiveness, the one who tries to redeem things. fuck i say. and aaron and leigh are renting a hotel room for new year's eve. hmm well i could hang with them for a little while i guess. i just finished talking to aaron and wow, "i would be so pissed if someone said that to me! i would just not talk to her" and i dont think i will do that, i dont because either i know you dont just think i am an idiot, or i AM an idiot (i really hope its the first part that is true). UGH and bah humbug to this day too! i think im going to the beach to read through the looking glass because im kind of at a loss for any external emotion and that would make me the zombie to anyone else than me.