at least Explosions in the sky will be here

2004-09-15, 12:34 a.m.

so its really quiet in here, and the door is closed. i looked to see if lady had water in her bowl, but its gone now.

i have placed my heart under a comatose trance, and i lack the blood pressure to feel any essential emotion right now. my gender induced thoughts of sex, gone. the compassion that i should have felt when i saw my dog stop breathing, absent. even the crushing hallucinations that love illicit are no longer with me. i wonder if they will come back soon, because i smile easily, but its so physical, so superficial.