sometimes i really want people to own a piece of my brain, less explainations.

2003-09-26, 8:55 a.m.

the inherent phase of being where you become a duality, both disgusted with yourself in the eyes of another (not physically, but through your interactions with them), nad in complete awe of being; of its ambient sounds, accidental poets, varicose veins of light in the clouds, spherical butterflies whose probiscii flitter on your insides, the leafs of fire, the warm cement which warms your feet, and even the last things you see when you close your eyes to sleep. so i said that today, so i guess i am trying to make it clear of this: IT IS ONLY AN EXCERCISE. once we lose the understanding of our reaction as a long test, a set of equations that we fashion, no real solution. the answer could be 'i', but where do you go with that? backwards to root 2? forwards into a phase of being that we have not upgraded?

i would rather taunt the fargile waves of negativity, than to sink ever so softly into contentment.